Week 7

Days 43 to 49 · 6 weeks 0 days to 6 weeks 6 days old · about 6 weeks This week many babies measure about 56 cm (22 in) and weigh roughly 4.8 kg (10.6 lb). Babies vary widely, and what matters is that your baby follows their own curve on the growth chart. The big news for many families is the first real smile, along with stronger neck muscles and a head that wobbles a little less. For you, six weeks is a traditional point for a check of your own: how you are healing, how you are feeling, and what you want to do about contraception. This week covers the social smile, your postnatal check, contraception, your baby's 6 to 8 week check, head control, sex and intimacy after birth, and depression and anxiety in partners.

Day 43 · 6 weeks 0 days old

The first real smile is on its way

You may already have seen your baby smile in their sleep or after a feed. Those early smiles are real movements, but they are mostly reflexes. Somewhere around now comes something different: your baby looks at your face, holds your gaze, and smiles because of you.

This social smile usually appears between about 4 and 8 weeks. It often starts as a slow brightening of the eyes before the mouth catches up, and it is more likely when your baby is fed, rested and calm. Once it arrives, it tends to come more often each day, in response to voices, faces and play. It is a milestone that matters for parents too. After weeks of giving and giving, getting something back can feel like a turning point. Many people say it is the moment the hard weeks start to feel worth it.

If your baby was born early, expect the smile closer to 6 weeks after their due date rather than their birth date. Babies reach this milestone at different times. If you have not seen a responsive smile by about 2 months, or 2 months corrected age, mention it at your baby's next check.

Try this: When your baby is alert and content, get close, smile broadly and talk softly, then wait. Give them several seconds to answer before you try again.

Day 44 · 6 weeks 1 day old

Your 6-week check is about you

Many parents are offered a postnatal check around 6 weeks after the birth, with a midwife, family doctor or obstetrician. Some places offer more than one visit in the early months. Either way, this appointment is for you, not the baby, even if the baby comes along.

Your care provider will usually ask about bleeding, pain and how any stitches or your caesarean wound have healed. They may check your blood pressure, and sometimes your weight, your belly and, if needed, your perineum. If you had diabetes or high blood pressure in pregnancy, follow-up tests may be arranged. Expect questions about your mood, sleep and support. Answer honestly. This is one of the best chances to talk about low mood, anxiety or a difficult birth experience, and help is available. You will probably also talk about contraception and about sex.

Bring a list. Leaking urine or wind, pain during sex, ongoing pelvic heaviness, a gap in your belly muscles, hair loss, heavy periods and feeding worries are all fair topics. None of them is something you simply have to live with.

Call your care provider if you have not been offered a postnatal check and would like one, or if anything on your list feels urgent before the appointment.

Try this: Write down your three most important questions now, and put the list in your phone or bag for the appointment.

Day 45 · 6 weeks 2 days old

Contraception is worth sorting out now

You can get pregnant again surprisingly soon after a birth. If you are not breastfeeding, ovulation can return as early as about 3 to 4 weeks after the birth, and it happens before your first period. Even if another baby is part of your plans one day, a choice made on purpose is easier than a surprise. Breastfeeding can delay ovulation, but it only works as contraception under strict conditions: your baby is under 6 months, you breastfeed exclusively and often, day and night, with no long gaps, and your periods have not returned. If any of these changes, including regular bottles or long stretches of sleep at night, protection drops quickly.

There are many options that are safe while breastfeeding. Progestin-only methods, such as the progestin-only pill, the implant and the injection, do not affect milk supply. A copper or hormonal intrauterine device (IUD) can be placed after the birth, often at or after the postnatal check. Condoms work at any time. Methods containing estrogen, such as the combined pill, patch or ring, are usually started a little later, because of a higher risk of blood clots in the early weeks and a possible effect on milk supply.

Your care provider can help you weigh what fits your body, feeding and plans.

Try this: Talk with your partner tonight about whether, and roughly when, you would like another baby, so you can go into your check with a clear idea.

Day 46 · 6 weeks 3 days old

Your baby's 6 to 8 week check

In many places, babies have a full examination somewhere between 6 and 8 weeks, with a doctor, nurse practitioner or public health nurse. In some places it is combined with the first vaccines at about 2 months. Your local schedule will tell you when.

Your baby will be weighed and measured, including the head, and the results plotted on their growth chart. The doctor or nurse listens to the heart, checks the hips by gently moving the legs, looks in the eyes with a light to check the red reflex, feels the soft spot on the head and looks along the spine. For boys, they check that both testes have come down. They may also check muscle tone and reflexes.

Just as important are the questions. Expect to be asked how feeding is going, how your baby sleeps and where, whether they smile and follow faces, and how you are coping. Use the time for your own questions too, whether about a rash, a noisy breather, poos, crying or anything else on your mind. If something needs a closer look, such as a click in the hip or a heart murmur, you may be referred for further tests. Many of these turn out to be minor, but follow through with any appointment you are offered.

Try this: Undress your baby down to their diaper just before you go in, or dress them in something easy to remove, and bring a spare diaper for the scales.

Day 47 · 6 weeks 4 days old

Your baby's neck is getting stronger

At birth your baby's head flopped whenever it was not supported. By now you may notice it wobbles less. When you hold your baby upright on your shoulder, they may lift their head for a moment to look around before it bobs back down.

Head control develops from the top down. First comes the neck, then the shoulders, then the upper back. During tummy time, many babies at 6 to 8 weeks can lift their head briefly, perhaps to about 45 degrees, and turn it from side to side. By about 3 to 4 months, most can hold the head steady when upright and push up on their forearms. The range is wide, and babies who spend more awake time on their tummies often get there a little sooner. Keep supporting the head and neck when you lift, carry or lay your baby down. A sudden drop backwards still needs your hand behind the head. When pulling your baby from lying to sitting, expect the head to lag behind for a few more weeks.

If tummy time is a battle, try your baby lying tummy down on your chest while you lean back. Your face gives them a reason to look up, and it counts. Try this: Do two short tummy-time sessions today on your chest or a firm mat, and notice how high your baby lifts their head.

Day 48 · 6 weeks 5 days old

Sex after birth happens when you are ready

There is no fixed date when you should start having sex again. The 6-week check is often treated as the green light, but many people do not feel ready then, and some feel ready sooner. A sensible guide is to wait until bleeding has stopped and any tear or wound has healed, and then to go by how you feel.

Low desire is very common in the first months. Tiredness, a changed body, feeding, being touched all day and worry about pain all play a part. Breastfeeding lowers estrogen, which can leave the vagina dry and tender. A water-based lubricant helps a great deal, and going slowly, with plenty of time, helps more.

Intimacy is wider than intercourse. Cuddling, a shower together, a massage or simply falling asleep holding hands can keep you connected while your body recovers. Talking openly about what feels good and what does not, without pressure on either side, is the foundation.

Some pain the first few times is common, but it should ease. Persistent pain is not something to put up with.

Call your care provider if sex is still painful after a few attempts, you have pain at the site of a tear or scar, or you notice bleeding after sex. A pelvic health physiotherapist can also help with pain and tightness.

Try this: Buy a water-based lubricant to have on hand, so it is ready whenever you decide the time is right.

Day 49 · 6 weeks 6 days old

Partners can struggle with low mood too

Postpartum depression and anxiety are usually discussed as something that affects the parent who gave birth. But about 1 in 10 fathers and non-birthing partners also develop depression in the year after a baby arrives, and anxiety is common too. The risk is higher when the birth parent is also struggling. In partners, depression does not always look like sadness. It can show up as irritability, anger, feeling numb, working late to avoid home, drinking more, withdrawing from the baby or from friends, or physical complaints like headaches and stomach trouble. Many partners say nothing, because they feel their job is to be the strong one.

Contributing factors include lack of sleep, money worries, a hard birth that was frightening to witness, feeling shut out of feeding and caring, and changes in the couple's relationship. None of these is a weakness. Help works for partners just as it does for birth parents: talking therapy, support groups for fathers or partners, and sometimes medication. A family doctor is a good first step.

Get help right away if you, or your partner, have thoughts of harming yourself or anyone else: call your local emergency number or a crisis line. For your partner: Ask yourself honestly how you have been for the past two weeks. If the answer is "not good", book an appointment with your own doctor this week, and tell someone you trust.